Ok, everyone just TAKE A MOMENT TO READ THIS PLEASE:
THIS IS APPARENTLY A THING - I never heard of this until I became a Mom myself, but please tell me, what gender does that baby look like?
What gender does MY baby look like? Take a wild guess.
You can’t tell, can you? Yeah. That’s my baby boy up there, Anieran. And I’m disgusted with how people have been telling me to raise him ever since he’s come home from the NICU.
I figured it was a thing with my Mother when she would tell me these simply because it’s just because she’s from earlier times and has had brothers and it’s just a way they treated men back then…
But who does this? I was out one day waiting for a friend to stop by to say bye before we head back home from my last convention in Texas, and a lady walked up and wanted to see the baby. Of course, there’s no harm in letting someone look since he is pretty cute. He was asleep, and shaded in his stroller, but had dirtied all the clothes I had brought because he was a little sick that day, so was wearing one of my sister’s shirts. Needless to say, she thought it was the cutest baby GIRL she’s ever seen. But he started to cry because the light woke him up, I immediately picked him up to soothe him back to sleep. The lady told me I’m very lucky to have such a sweet daughter and that I’m such a wonderful Mom, and I smiled and said ‘Thank you, but this is my baby boy, he’s just wearing something of my sister’s until we get home.’
And the look she gave me, oh, should’ve been enough for me to tell her to stop right there. The words she said to me exactly were ‘Oh. A boy, huh? You know, you really shouldn’t hold him so much. He’s crying for no good reason, and all you’re doing is spoiling him.’
… I just stood there and looked at her. A second ago she had NO problem what-so-ever with my soothing my baby because I woke him up on accident for her to see him. And now that it’s a boy, it’s completely different.
I’d really like someone to please explain to me how comforting a 3 month old INFANT BABY who is crying tears from being awoken and frightened is a bad thing and ‘spoiling them’ when they don’t even understand said concepts, and when I am all he has in the world since he can’t do anything for himself yet? I told her it was my child and I can do what I feel I need to. But I’ve found that she isn’t the only person that thinks like this. A lot of my friends, my parents, grandparents, and strangers tell me the same things. I let my Mother watch him once, and he was crying for a full 20 minutes before I ran upstairs and took him from her. I started to feed him and he fell asleep within 5 minutes flat.
She told me that I really shouldn’t get him used to having something shoved into his mouth when he cries because then he’s going to never be an independent man and become fat and that no Woman let alone person will want to deal with someone like that if I keep raising him this way.
Needless to say I stormed off to my room. I just don’t get it. I don’t get how people can sit there and let a baby cry the way they do when they NEED YOU, Boy or Girl, I don’t feel it matters, they’re a child… Do you?